… take the nostalgic and jaded pills together!

This is my final post about Japan; one that is tinged with jaded sarcasm but with some nostalgic commentary. It has been a roller coaster ride of ups and downs. I would like to write about things I view as ups before I get to some of my perceived downs, not necessarily downs just frustrations and wonderment still as to how this society interacts with one another. It is a long one so get ready.

Japanese food - Oh how I will miss Japanese food. Let’s count the ways.
1. Ramen noodles – but specifically Mabo Tofu Ramen (noodles with a spicy mince meat and tofu sauce)
2. Katsudon (a bowl of rice with a breaded pork cutlet with egg on top)
3. Sushi
4. Gyoza (Chinese dumplings)
5. OBentos (boxed lunches Japanese style)
6. Tempura
7. Sashimi
8. Croquettes
9. Okonomiyaki (Japanese savory pancake)
10. Japanese rice (ALL other rice is shit compared with Japanese sticky rice)

Autumn weather – coming from Australia, we don’t have “good” autumns because we don’t have that many trees that turn red, yellow and gold colours and there isn’t so much of a contrast between summer and winter. I will genuinely miss autumns in Japan. It’s all about the leaves turning really.

Two Japanese friends - without naming them, I will miss my only two Japanese friends. To be fair, I haven’t tried very hard to make Japanese friends but it hasn’t been easy. My two friends are very internationalized and are excellent people. Sometimes I feel they should both leave Japan and be happier elsewhere. From my perspective, they are both seeking international relationships because they feel Japanese people just don’t cut the mustard anymore and I agree with them. They would be a lot happier elsewhere.

KUIS – Let me begin with our friends from here. I know that I speak on behalf of Jen when I say we have formed many strong friendships with people at KUIS and we both treasure those relationships. It will be a shame that we can’t see these people each week or month but we hope to see them once every year or two. Of course there were your typical foreign friends from Oz, USA, England and Canada but also friends at work from Japan. These were the people that we shared good times and a laugh very frequently. Thank you to all of them.

For me personally, KUIS students have been very enjoyable to teach and have in the classroom. Generally, they are very studious, hard working and motivated. Generally, they are friendly and nice to chat with. I would say that I have even become friends with a few and that our home in the future would be open to them if they ever wanted to come and visit us. These students are the future of Japan and hopefully the rest of Japan will follow in their footsteps. Hopefully the rest of Japan will wake up to themselves and realize that they can’t learn a foreign language by only studying vocabulary, grammar or completing a textbook or Nintendo DS game on the train. The majority of my students see communication as being an integral factor in language and are always eager to practice with me and each other.

During the last weeks of my 3 years in Japan, I was reminded of the sincerity of certain students. I can honestly reiterate that these couple of students have become my friends. One student in particular took time out of her busy schedule to teach me Arabic. It was really funny learning Arabic with a Japanese pronunciation. (p.s. It has definitely worked because since arriving in the UAE, I have shocked a few people with a) my terrible pronunciation and b) the few phrases I know.) Another student was very genuine when they made cheesecake for those teachers who were leaving (that they knew) and it was absolutely scrumpious! Other students must be mentioned for organizing several student farewell parties for me and other leaving teachers, which turned out to be wonderful events. Let me preface the next part with "the beer certainly helped" BUT I can honestly say that at one of these parties, I finally felt that barrier in the student - teacher relationship lifted and I finally felt like I just might be talking with friends. It was a fun conversation and I didn't feel like I was their teacher; I hope they felt the same way.

Public transport. Where else in the world will public transport be one of the positives of a city? Public transport in the local area of Makuhari where I used to live and then in Tokyo is very convenient and quick. Back in Sydney, during the peak hours trains might come once every twenty minutes. the most you'll have to wait out in the suburbs where I was is 10 mins (MAX!!!). within Tokyo, mostly you would only have to wait 5 or so mins. It is safe, reliable and if it is remotely late, they will apologise profusely and give every passenger a late slip (if they want it). Students obviously take one to show to their teachers but even workers take one just in case.

Jen’s friends. Two nice ladies who befriended Jen – without naming them, I will always remember two very friendly ladies who loved having Jen come over for lunch and speaking half English and half Japanese with her. One of the reasons why this is a good memory for me is because one lady always cooked Japanese food with Jen and then she would come home and cook for me! The other lady made lunch for Jen but would always give leftovers to Jen for me. On one occasion each, I met the two ladies with Jen and enjoyed their hospitality.

And finally snowboarding. (I know, I always tell my students “never start a sentence with “and” but I had to!) The powder snow is awesome in Japan. I have snowboarded in 5 different places including twice at the famous Aussie powder snow capital (of Australia) Niseko! I subsequently went snowboarding twice in Colorado and I think we just got pretty bad days BUT comparing average snow in Japan and average snow in Colorado, Japan wins hands down. The lift lines are always short and the lifties always friendly. There are plenty of wide runs or runs throughout trees. There are many runs that are tree lined and it is easy to zip in and out. There are awesome backcountry runs and the terrain is checked by ski patrol every day so if there is an emergency, you have a bigger chance of being found. As a number of random Aussies have told me throughout my two times there, the powder snow in Japan is very forgiving, very! If you fall [not that I do ;)], it will be generally a soft cushioned one. Often when waiting for Jen I land on my knees and it didn’t hurt that much in the soft powder. Oh how I will miss Japanese powder snow.

So now I turn to some faults, or shall I say glowing problems, that I see in Japanese society. Are they unique to Japan? Hell no. Are these generalizations? Generally. Is this diatribe unwarranted? Perhaps. Unjustified? Possibly. Not necessary? Maybe. Are these meant to be funny? Some might be. Are these meant to be serious? You might consider some to be.

As a note to you, the reader, if you think Japan is wonderful and do not want to hear negative comments about it, please do not read this. I do not want to be the first to burst that bubble for you.

So why rant and rave? Well, in the past year I have really begun to see a different side of Japan; a side that really only revealed itself since Jen left. I believe this is because I have had time (a lot to be honest) to step back and look at things from a different vantage point. I have felt more aware of my surroundings and my point of view or angle from which I viewed things changed from being a couple to a “single”. Like our arrival in Japan, things were pretty good from the outset. Everything was new and exciting. But as time went by with Jen, things started looking different, they began to change as I grew weary to the ways of the samurai, but Jen was always here so things were still pretty good. April 2008 came along and we did our long distance thing, again. My outlook changed as I mentioned before and there was nothing to stop me from seeing the world without my bright and happy foreigner goggles on. Then came October and November 2008. These two months contain some of the best and worst memories of the time I have spent in Japan without Jen. I was on cloud nine for several reasons and brought back down to earth with a sudden jolt for other reasons. My life has been snowballing since April 2008 and finally in October and November, it picked up a lot of speed and has left me where I am today; a bit bitter, twisted, jaded and eager to see Japan get smaller in the rear-view-mirror.

I’ll give you an example of what I mean in the last paragraph. When we first arrived in March 2006, when Japanese people stopped and stared at me (or us), I would always feel excited by it, like I was some exclusive exotic foreigner that they hadn’t seen before, like I was special or different so of course they wanted to stare at me; I couldn't blame them. That was the bleary eyed viewpoint which probably all foreigners have when they start living in a new country. Then came the middle period where I didn’t notice it. I don’t ever remember thinking anything of it, I don’t remember it worrying me or thinking I was special anymore. But Jen left and the honeymoon was over for good. Slowly as I noticed Japanese folks still staring at me, it began to annoy me, irritate me. I started thinking why? Is it the clothes I am wearing? My hat? My sunglasses? The bike I am riding? Then it began to stir me, like an old wound getting picked and becoming open again. I started to hate it when people gawked as if I am somehow sub-human, like a creature that surfaced two days ago. Classic example. I was at the train station and was minding my own business trying to stay out of the frigid wind that was blowing and this old Japanese lady walks past and stares. Her feet were walking her forward but her head and eyes were staring at me, turning so that as she went past me, she could still look at me. At first I looked away and at the ground but I noticed she was still having a look. I just stared back until she was honestly 5 meters past me and stopped looking at me. Why? I have no idea.

Now in the following commentary I use the term “society” here and this is a generalization, I understand. Not all people believe some of the things I say but it is my view and it is the way that I see it. Things may be excessive or blown up a little. I appreciate that. However, the internet is a soap box for the international community to voice their opinions / views and I have chosen this time to stand on it and voice these things. If you want to make a comment, please feel free! If you want me to explain one or five of them, please feel free to ask. Some of these are my personal observations. Some of my foreign friends’ observations.

Things that still boggle my now rapidly fading ‘Japanese’ mind are:

Living in a society….
- that allows men to look at soft porn on trains yet is so prudent about sex.
- that will drive 60km/h down a narrow street without the smallest consideration for bicyclists and pedestrians sharing that same bit of asphalt.
- where citizens are polite and smile on the outside but can’t wait for you to leave and go away from them.
- that stares constantly at foreigners because they are standing at a bus stop in the middle of the suburbs (i.e. not in downtown Tokyo).
- where it is frowned upon to throw your garbage out after 8am even though the garbage isn’t collected until after 1pm but looking through trash that isn’t yours is ok.
- where doctors prescribe medicine in extremely low dosages that you have to take an entire pack for anything to even work.
- where pedestrian crossings are flatly ignored regardless of how far the pedestrian has walked across the crossing, how long they’ve been waiting to cross or how young the small school child is.
- where a comedy show will berate Manchester United’s Cristiano Ronaldo for being a cry baby (and I don’t deny that) but this same comedy show depict Japanese athletes who cry as being funny or passionate.
- that is polite on the surface but institutionalize discrimination against foreigners (Some ryokans and onsens).
- that encourages binge drinking nightly after work instead of going home to the family.
- that overworks their workforce and causes family breakdowns, divorces and work related health and mental problems.
- that has institutionalized yakuza crime in its government and businesses.
- where bribery is rife throughout business and government but never in the public eye.
- where grown men wear tight, very tight muscle shorts and skimpy muscle singlets (circa 1980s) to the gym but also wear a medical mask at the same time because they have a cold.
- that uses so much “indirectness” when conveying messages with any sort of emotions but will never seek a clarification if they don’t understand something.
- that a good majority of Japanese is devoid of any sort of emotion or feelings; so much so that it appears like a society of pre-programmed robots.
- that sees the importance of learning foreign languages, particularly English, but really detests the foreigners that come to teach it (I am not talking about my students here - its everyone else).
- that wants North Korea and the US to keep on apologizing for war crimes against Japan but will not recognize their own crimes against Asia during Japan’s reign of terror pre and during WWII.
- that rides bikes so much but where cars rule and terrorize the road and pedestrians think their king of the footpath.
- that warmly welcomes a Japanese person and 10 seconds later looks at a foreigner blankly.
- that openly walks away from the counter when a foreigner approaches it.
- that forces their employees to work until 9, 10, 11pm each and every night of the week just because they were forced to do it when they were first starting out.
- that lacks basic common courtesy and hides behind the excuse "Oh that is the Japanese way".
- that will promote a person to a higher position regardless of job performance or competence, just because they have been working at the company all their life and they are next in line for a promotion.
- where citizens don’t report a crime because they don’t want to trouble the local policeman.
- that has made a societal rule against talking on your phone on the train but neglected to make a rule against the B.O. / coffee / cigarette stale stench that is a businessman on the train.

.. and now I’m moving to the U.A.E. Wish me luck!